


Z o o t e d

by milkandleafs



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Crack, Kissing, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, Shotgunning, Team Bonding, Underage Drug Use, someone save shirabu kenjirou, tendou is a fool and ushijima is in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:34:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26225026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkandleafs/pseuds/milkandleafs
Summary: The team gets zooted and created one of the worst playlists in existence
Relationships: Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 73





	Z o o t e d

Z o o t e d 

  
  
  
  
  


“Shirabu. It is your sworn duty to keep the team z o o t e d as fuck when we graduate.” 

Never in his life had Shirabu seen Tendou look so serious. Ushijima and Semi stood behind him with their arms crossed, solemnly nodding like the bodyguards of some celebrity.

“What the fuck? What does zooted even fucking mean?”

“Come with us, future captain. We will get z o o t e d tonight.” The combination of Ushijima’s use of the word zooted and the serious look on his face caused Shirabu’s lips to twitch and he firmly pressed his lips together to stop himself from laughing directly into his captains face.

“Wakatoshi’s mom isn’t home for the week. Come with us after practice.” Semi was also trying his best to hold back a laugh, his ‘serious’ face wavering.

“You still haven’t told me what getting zooted is.”

“Experiencing is knowing.” 

“Tendou that is absolutely not the saying.”

* * *

An hour later, Ushijima, Tendou, Semi, Shirabu, and for some reason Goshiki were sitting around Ushijima’s unfairly large kitchen island. 

“Tendou did you bring it?”

“Of course I did, Semisemi? Who do you think I am? The real question is did  _ you _ bring  _ it _ ?”

“Of course I did.”

“What are you guys even talking about? Bring what Tendou-senpai?” Goshiki was confused but he had the spirit. 

After some kind of mental countdown, Tendou pulled out weed and Semi pulled out rolling paper and a bong. With a sigh at their antics, Ushijima went to his room and returned with a bag of gummy bear edibles. 

“...Are you kidding me? You forced me to come here for this?” Shirabu was shocked, in tears almost. 

“Shirabu-senpai, what is all this?”

“Goshiki… it’s um… team bonding! With the devil’s lettuce.” Tendou looked like he suddenly remembered the 15-year-old in their presence. 

“Ushijima-senpai, will this make me the best ace? Will I be better than you if I do it?”

Looking taken aback Ushijima could only reply, “No, absolutely not. You’re not allowed to touch the weed at all tonight. I do it to have fun with my friends, not to be a better ace.” At Goshiki’s disappointed look, he ruffled the younger boy’s atrocious bowl cut and continued, “You don’t need to copy everything I do to become a great ace. Do something that makes you happy.” His words seemed to work and Goshiki perked up again like an overexcited puppy.

“...Anyway, it’s time to get z o o t e d.” Tendou turned to the table to start rolling joints, while Semi started grinding down the weed to load the bong. Once they were finished, Tendou immediately lit up a messily-rolled joint and took a hit. Once he had taken a sufficient hit, he pulled Ushijima in by the neck and blew the smoke between his lips. Ushijima, despite how vile that was, went along with it and smiled into the chaste kiss Tendou offered him afterward. 

With a disgusted noise at their antics, Semi inhaled from the bong and exhaled the smoke in some rings aimed at Goshiki. He laughed as the younger boy sneezed.

“Guys let’s go outside. The smell is really strong.” At Ushijima’s prompting, Tendou grabbed the joints and went to go sit on the deck. The rest of the boys joined him and they continued to smoke in relative silence until Goshiki asked if he could try some. At Tendou and Goshiki’s pleading, Ushijima handed one(1) gummy bear to the boy.

“Shirabu, do you want anything? We invited you so you could get z o o t e d and have fun, but you’ve been really quiet.” Semi’s voice was quiet next to his ear. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think I wanna try one of those gummy bears.” Ushijima handed him one and he stared at it dubiously before popping it in his mouth and chewing. 

“Be careful,” Tendou giggled, “The ones Wakatoshi makes are really strong so don’t take more than one for a while.” He broke off into more giggles and he took another hit off the joint. 

After thirty minutes of easy conversation, all of the boys were sufficiently high save for Ushijima, who had only been messily shotgunning from Tendou. It was kind of disgusting honestly. Shirabu did not need to see his captain make out with one of his friends while smoke came out between their mouths. Kinda traumatizing but go off.

“Wait guys guys guys. I have an idea. We should make a hype playlist for the bus and locker rooms and stuff.”

Though Shirabu wanted to shut his idea down, he found himself nodding and saying that it was a great idea.

Forty-five minutes and a lot of fighting later, a playlist was made on Tendou’s Spotify called ‘shiratorizawa hype😤🤑’. The playlist consisted of country and old music from Ushijima, 2000’s rock from Semi, k-pop from Shirabu, alt/screamo rap from Tendou, Tik Tok songs from Goshiki, and female rap in honor of Reon, who couldn’t come because he was doing non-degenerate things. 

* * *

At all of their remaining games, they would blast the playlist on the bus, in the locker rooms, and walking onto the court. It wasn’t uncommon to see Ushijima moody cause Tendou skipped Ring of Fire or Shirabu murderous because Semi insulted Twice.

After that night, all other teams came to be afraid of the playlist that was a horrible blend of genres that never should exist on the same plane together.

**Author's Note:**

> Lmao I cut this short cause I didn't feel like writing anything long
> 
> The actual playlist: [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/26wpkboey89izZS2dPeGxf?si=0SHhdRJKTDuhZRgPnGmSyA)
> 
> Follow me on twt: [@milkandleafs](https://twitter.com/milkandleafs?s=20)


End file.
